So what do you think, man?
What do I think about what?
That's the Brady Bunch house. That's the house where they shot The Brady Bunch.
Are you on crack? Does that honestly look like the Brady Bunch house to you?
From inside it does. Straight up, dude.
I was there delivering a pizza last night,
and the guy who lives there is all, like, trying to crowd the door so I can't see inside.
But then he drops his Crazy Bread and bends down,
and boom, I see it all, man -
the Brady Bunch house.
- I'll prove it. - No, wait.
What are you doing?
Blake? It's midnight, man.
My honour is at stake, man.
All right, nobody's home. Let's go.
Come on.
It's not even locked.
You're trippin', dude.
See?
I told you.
This is exactly like on the show.
Look at this. That weird horse sculpture.
And the vase that Peter broke. Mom always said "Don't play ball in the house."
Remember that one?
- I don't understand this. - Who's on crack now, huh?
Hello?
Remember the episode where Marcia broke her nose?
She got hit with a football, right?
- Screw this, man. I'm out of here. - Daley, don't be a puss.
Daley!
Hello?
Bobby?
Cindy?
Wait. Wait.
Come on, man. Come on.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
I'm tellin' you.
No. I don't see how.
Well, how else do you explain it?
The guy falls from a plane or, I dunno, maybe a helicopter.
Out the door, and then...
Bam.
Simple as that.
And how did he wind up in a helicopter? He was busy breaking into a house at the time.
Details.
What you got?
Maybe nothing.
- You the people from the FBI? - Michael Daley?
Is someone finally gonna arrest that freak?
How about you tell us what you witnessed, and we'll go from there?
What I witnessed was freaksville, man. My friend was murdered.
Who'd have thought this could happen at the Brady Bunch house?
- That's not the Brady Bunch house. - Yeah, it is.
I know it doesn't look like it, but it is. That's where they shot the show.
No, they shot the show on a sound stage in Hollywood.
The house in the exteriors is a split-level in Studio City. I took a picture of it once.
I'm telling you, it's like some kind of creepy Brady Bunch museum in there.
I told the cops to search it, but they wouldn't.
But whatever the hell happened to Blake, it happened right in there.
Oliver Martin?
Mr Martin, I'm Agent Reyes. This is Agent Doggett. We're with the FBI.
- This is about the death across the street? - Yes. May we come in?
- I already talked to the police about this. - Yes, sir. We know.
As I told them, I didn't see or hear anything. I wasn't home.
- This guy's stonewalling. Kick the door in. - Shut up.
I'm really kinda busy.
Mr Martin, just five minutes and we'll be out of your hair.
Unless you want us to get a warrant, and then... we could be here for hours.
Right in here, see?
What happened?
This isn't what I saw.
None of it.
It's all different.
Where'd it all go?
I'm... not following.
What happened to all the Brady Bunch stuff?
Mr Daley was under the impression that your house was used for filming The Brady Bunch.
Well...
it wasn't.
I know what I saw.
What are you lookin' at?
I wanna check somethin' out.
Aha.
Hold this, please.
Aha.
Twice with the "ahas".
Roof's been patched. When I was inside I knew I smelled fresh plaster.
So are you gonna fill me in?
Our eyewitness places the deceased inside this house just prior to his demise.
We found a fragment of roofing shingle at the scene of the impact.
It would seem it matches the discarded piece you now hold in your hand.
There's a hole in the roof, recently patched, this big around.
Connect A to B to C.
Much in the fashion of, say, Daffy Duck or Wile E Coyote,
the deceased shot up through the roof, flew high in the air and landed on his buddy's car.
- You're serious? - A to B to C.
I gotta tell you, I think I'm finally getting the hang of this job.
Case number 14-308.
Blake McCormick, a well-nourished Caucasian male, 24 years old.
I will begin with my external examination.
And here is a likely place to start.
Agh!
Help me out here, Agent Scully.
Monica thinks I'm losing my marbles. What can you tell us about what happened?
For starters, Mr McCormick was dead before he landed on the car.
His skull was pulverised from a previous impact.
And judging by the roofing material that I found in the wound,
I'd say that Agent Doggett's theory holds water.
Like I asked Agent Doggett, how exactly can that be?
- Electricity. - How's that?
Or maybe electricity is only a by-product, I'm not really sure, but...
I had an odd experience today, and it made me think to try something unusual.
I borrowed an EEG machine and I wired Mr McCormick to it.
And for the last few hours he's been putting off a faint reading.
- Are you saying he's alive? - No. He's dead as a hammer.
What I'm reading is residual electricity, like a battery that's draining off its charge.
It's fascinating. I mean, I've never seen anything quite like it.
But what does it mean?
If Mulder were here,
I'd imagine he'd talk about research linking electromagnetic fluctuations to levitation...
poltergeist activity, ghost sightings...
Ghosts and poltergeists? That's what Mulder would say?
At the end of the day, I wouldn't have any theory that was any better.
And I don't now.
Here's to you, buddy.
Well, folks, I made pork chops and apple sauce.
What is this, man?
What in holy freakin' hell is this, man?!
Please, leave.
They were here. I saw 'em. I saw 'em all!
Leave, before it's too late.
I saw the Brady Bunch.
Oh, my God. What are you doing?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God!
Aaargh!
Over here, guys. Get the body in the background.
Smile. All of Southern California's watching us scratch our heads in confusion.
Let's go get some damn answers.
I've said all I'm gonna say to you people. You don't like it, go get your warrant.
He called your bluff.
- Maybe we can get a warrant. - Yeah.
"Judge, I wanna toss the house of a man who makes people magically zoom into the sky."
"It has something to do with electricity and poltergeists and whatnot."
Yeah, that'll fly.
- Doggett. - So the owner won't talk, huh?
- Excuse me? - Smile. You're on TV.
Ahh.
I'm in Los Angeles, at the field office.
I've called in someone whom you'll both wanna meet.
April 4, 1970. 10.36am.
Present for this test are John Reits, speaking, and Anthony Fogelman, age 8. Hello, Anthony.
Are you ready to begin? Good.
Now, relax.
Relax and focus.
Almost immediately, the EEG is registering an increase in fast beta-wave activity on all leads.
Theta activity is rising as well.
Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness...
Well, there you have it.
My right hand to God, all four blocks rose off of the table
and spiralled halfway to the ceiling before they fell.
Too bad that wasn't on film.
The understatement of a lifetime.
Whatever phenomenon caused this, I also believe that it radiated
an electromagnetic field strong enough to fog the image.
Well, don't be polite. Call me crazy. Everybody does.
I believe you.
Did you recognise that kid? That was our suspect, Oliver Martin. Right?
I went through Mulder's reference books. Van Nuys, California, 1970.
One of the best-documented cases of what was thought to be poltergeist activity.
It focused on a young boy, Anthony Fogelman, who has since changed his name.
And Dr Reits was the parapsychologist who investigated it.
Objects flew around the house. Rooms would grow inexplicably cold.
Strange voices would be heard. Anthony's mother was at the end of her rope.
I spent six months with her and her son.
- Six astonishing months. - What did you learn?
That Anthony was as bewildered as everyone else,
but that he was responsible for all of it.
- He was psychokinetic. - He was the Mozart of psychokinesis.
In your line of work, why would you fall out of touch with the Mozart of psychokinesis?
Over time... Anthony's abilities faded.
The last few months I was with him, there were no manifestations of it whatsoever.
He lost his power.
We're lookin' at him for two murders. What can you give us that we can take to a judge?
Was he an angry kid? Was he violent?
I can't say what he grew up to be. I... haven't spoken to him in 30 years.
But the Anthony I knew was a lonely little boy.
- Bye. - Bye.
This is a message for Oliver Martin.
Oliver, I believe I knew you years ago as Anthony.
This is Dr John Reits calling. Remember me?
It's been far too long, and, uh, I'd love to talk to you.
I'd really... like to catch up.
Obviously, uh, you're all grown-up now.
It's funny. I have trouble picturing that.
My God, how time flies.
But, uh, anyway, you can reach me any time on my cellphone.
714-555-0146.
I look forward to hearing from you. Bye now.
- I guess he's not home. - He's home.
Aha.
I was wondering why a man with no criminal record would change his name.
And then I thought about the name itself - Oliver Martin. It sounded familiar, so I ran it.
Through what? NCIC?
No... a Brady Bunch website.
It popped right up.
"Cousin Oliver"?
- Who the hell's that? - Carol Brady's nephew.
He lived with the Bradys during the last season of the show.
You're speaking Greek to me here. What's this case have to do with an old TV show?
You remember what Daley claimed he saw inside that house.
He said it was the Brady Bunch house. He seemed certain of it.
And now this name - Oliver Martin. Just connecting A to B to C.
Is this makin' any sense to you?
When you knew Anthony, was he nutty for The Brady Bunch?
No. We'd watch it together.
OK, say he is. What's it mean?
Well, why name himself after Cousin Oliver?
None of the other Bradys liked Oliver, he was a self-described pest.
The jinx.
Cousin Oliver, the jinx.
So maybe I watched an episode or two.
So what you're saying is that his choice speaks to Anthony Fogelman's character?
How he views himself - unlucky, star-crossed, a danger.
OK, so be it. Just tell me how this helps me bust him and I'm happy.
Well, I'm starting to hope that it doesn't come to that.
What do you mean?
The power this man seemingly possesses is extraordinary. It needs to be studied.
It could expand the scope of human knowledge. It could change everything.
It very well could.
I mean, I've been working this unit for nine years now.
I've investigated nearly 200 paranormal cases.
We are due for some incontrovertible proof. I want vindication.
For Mulder, and... for all of us.
What in the hell?
What is it?
Agent Doggett? What?
Wait here.
Oliver Martin? FBI.
- Get out of my house. - Oliver...
There's someone here that wants to talk to you. Dr Reits.
Do you remember him?
Why won't you people just leave me alone? Please, get out!
Agh! No!
Oh, crap.
Oliver?
Dr Reits?
I could use some help up here.
Oliver?
You up there?
Is it down there? Whatever the hell.
Oliver. Oliver!
- Anthony? - Hey!
Hey, I'm up here!
Dr Reits, help me out here!
Anthony?
Come back here, man! He's dangerous!
Anthony?
Anthony...
let him go.
I can't.
Sure you can.
No.
- I don't know how. - Anthony...
you're a good person. I know that hasn't changed.
Relax and focus, remember?
Good.
Relax... and focus.
Oh, my God.
This is...
- Are you all right? - Yeah.
Just minor bruising.
Dana Scully, meet Oliver Martin.
Anthony Fogelman.
- Oliver. - Oliver.
- It's a great pleasure to meet you. - Where did all this come from, Oliver?
How did you make this come to be?
I think about it,
and it's here.
Can you think about other things?
What happens if you think about another place? A nice place?
Can you do that, Oliver? Please?
It's important to me.
Oh, my God.
Mainly, I like to be here.
Oliver,
with your help we could learn so much.
I would love to take you back with us to Washington.
It would mean so much to me, Oliver,
to show the whole world.
Wonderful.
Let's go get you packed.
- We've got a tiger by the tail. - Do you believe he intended to kill you?
He wanted me out of his house, and the way I went was involuntary, like a sneeze.
It means he's not in control of this power of his.
I think that's where we can help him.
He needs to learn how to control his powers.
I mean, my God, there's no end to what he could accomplish.
Or to the harm he could do if he goes off the deep end,
which isn't a long walk for this guy, in case you haven't noticed.
I mean, this whole Brady Bunch thing? I'm not so sure about this.
Well, we can't keep him here. Two people are dead. Clearly this isn't working.
And besides, I mean...
as grand as this may sound, we owe it to the world.
Maybe, except that I can't shake this feeling that the other shoe's gonna drop.
That there's something Oliver's not telling us.
Oliver? Coming?
Oliver?
Wow.
May I have a glass of water?
We'll only be a minute. Anything you need, just ask Arlene.
- So what do you think, Dr Jaycocks? - What do I think?
I think there's a hell of a lot of physics books that are due for major rewrites.
And I think a year from now you and Dr Reits will be in Stockholm accepting a Nobel prize.
This will change everything.
- May I use your phone? - Yeah.
So you're on board with this?
- What happens next? - I want Kersh to see this.
I want the director himself in here. Do you realise what this means? This kind of proof?
It ensures that they can't shut you down. It means the X-Files will go on forever.
Agent Scully!
- He's having a seizure. What happened? - I saw a big spark, then he just collapsed.
We need an ambulance. We got a man having a seizure. AD Skinner's office. Make it quick.
It was just all the excitement. A little bed rest will do him wonders.
And we'll get things right back on schedule.
- What do his doctors say? - His electrolytes were severely imbalanced.
That sent him into shock. They've stabilised his fluids.
- When will they release him? - There are problems.
His thyroid level is elevated. His glucose is low.
CPK, liver enzymes and BUN, they're all elevated.
- Which in a nutshell means...? - It points to a multi-system organ failure.
Gradually his body is consuming itself.
It's been going on for months, and maybe even years.
What's causing it?
His doctors have no idea, but I think I'm starting to.
This power of his, it's eating him alive.
And if so, it follows that the more he uses it the more his health will decline.
Until finally...
What in the hell?
My God.
Oliver?
Oliver, those people just now, was that...?
Were they...?
Why were they here?
To say goodbye.
Why goodbye, Oliver?
Because I'm dying.
April 4, 1970. 10.36am.
Present for this test are John Reits, speaking, and Anthony Fogelman, age 8. Hello, Anthony.
Are you ready to begin?
- Any change in his condition? - They're trying everything they can think of.
Experimental drugs, plasma transfusion.
- None of that's gonna work. - Why not?
Because they're treatin' the symptoms, not the cause.
- What do you have, John? - One big question.
Why The Brady Bunch?
Seriously. You two are fans. Why are people still watching a 30-year-old TV show?
Because... they're the family everyone wishes they had.
Loving parents, lots of brothers and sisters, everybody getting along.
They're the perfect family, and since Oliver didn't have one as a child, he created one.
Sure, I'd buy all that. But in this case, why The Brady Bunch?
Why not The Partridge Family? Why not Eight Is Enough?
Where was Oliver when he first saw The Brady Bunch? He was with you, right?
He'd always insist that we watch it together, every week I was there.
The longer you two were together, the more his power faded,
until finally it went away completely.
Now, why do you think that was?
Because for the first time in his life...
he was happy.
Because he was with you.
What are you suggesting is the course of action, John?
Oliver's gonna die if he continues to use his power.
His power goes away when he's happy.
You're the father he never had and he loves you.
A to B to C.
Come on, Oliver. You gotta eat something, man. Doctor's orders.
Talk to him, will you?
Oliver?
You have to understand -
my life's work,
the vindication of it, it's so important to me.
I let it blind me.
I treated you like a lab rat, and not a man.
And 30 years ago...
I left with barely a goodbye.
I am sorry for that.
You can't use your power. Not ever again.
I forbid it.
I can't be alone.
You won't be.
You've got me.
Can you forgive me, Oliver?
Anthony.
So close, Dana.
I'm sorry you don't get your proof.
Me too.
Well, maybe I've had it these past nine years.
If not proof of the paranormal, then...
of more important things.
Here's hoping the TV stays off and he learns how to love the real world.
I think you are getting the hang of this job.
Rob Coiling
I made this!